Nothing?

It's been so long since the last time i wrote a post for this blog, but it hit me and now here i am! ^_^ From the moment this thought hit me, i took a pen and start writing. It is so nice of me!! >.< i know, you don't have to tell me ^_^. Anyway, the thing is that today i was playing a game on the pc and notice the experience bar on my character. I stopped and i stared at it. It wasn't moving. That's cause i wasn't doing anything with my character. Then i thought of myself. And then it hit me. You can't gain experience by doing nothing, but you can gain experience from "nothing". "Nothing" as zero, from the start or from the bottom. This is something real. Like for example when you reach a certain point in your life where, in your mind, you have nothing. You are nothing. You can do, "nothing". But "nothing" is yet again a new beginning. After you've start moving again, you forget of "nothing" and you think of "something". This is not hope. This is you fighting back. This is you wanting a change and pursuing it. This is the point where you stop looking down, and start looking up.
This is Joseph and as always, Don't let me think. It's Dangerous!!!

Big L Compilation

I love to love you. It is a lovely feeling and i love having it. That love will remain in a lovely part of my lovely heart for the rest of my lovely life. It's a never ending love that will remain in a lovely way a lovely love. I love it when i love to talk about all these lovely things about you (the love of my life). I hope you love me too in this lovely way and that you love loving me too. I even love it more because we are sharing this lovely feeling of love and that we love each other in this lovely way full of love and lovely passion. But enough about love let's speak about something else. Did i mention that i have these lovely feelings for you? I love you!
ps Don't let me think. It's Dangerous!

Russell Brand - The only thing that matters to any of us is Love

I've just opened my heart

I often ask my self "would i be a good father?". Well would i? I shit my pants only in the thought of holding my own child in my hands! But yet again would it be fair to bring a child in this world? Some would say it's not your decision but yet again who am i, and what right do i have to bring a child in all of this mess. Don't get me wrong, i will be more than happy to have a kid of my own, but still i don't consider it fair for that kid to live in today's world. I hate today's world so much and i most definitely don't want to raise a child with the current status. And then comes the next question. Do i deserve to be a dad? Do i? After all i've bin through, it seems to me that any choice i make for that kid it will be disastrous. I guess i take the examples from my dad. :-(

All of these spins in my head and yet again i start picturing my self with a kid in my arms. My own child. My own blood. Me, printed in a new life. My beginning and my end. True unconditional love. Just the thought of my kid growing up makes me want to cry. Honestly.

This time, am sitting here, and am writing my guts out. One day i will have my own kids, and i will have my own family, with the most special person in the world! "i know we had it bad since the beginning, but still i haven't lost hope. I know am not perfect, i know you're not perfect and i know we most definitely don't represent perfect, but still we represent us. That's more than enough for me. We've been through so much and we are still HERE! That must count for something. You've accepted me the way i am, all of my goods(1%) and all of my bad(99%). You are still with me and i can't even start telling you how grateful i am to you. I don't do good with promises, but you know that i will try my best for a better future. You know i wont give up. Never. You are my life. Without you am nothing. If i am proud about something in my life, that is YOU. I write down this last sentence with a tear. I love you and i miss you!

$%^&!"£*G!"%R^&G*E%!£^"&*F$E%^&"!£*%FE*!"£^*

Ok this is what am thinking: dlfajskfgvldslknfcldmcnvksavfmckmsdlnvorgtvuaskdmcfajblntvcrommasvlingcmn salvgkamclgnvnckgmaxdlngvkcjmxalcslnvgacumrxlkwacnvdsakmcuilrkxcsdvnlulmgrxkdfsnvlsacmklmdnmvkcslda,fxmkscnmsak,lxcskmcksal,xfmcsnvgkmalckgvncmkfmvsltc,kcgnvkrltcfmslcfcaklsfmnaccmfklasdxmcmkasfnmlfxmsdckfnlwvtlirmltdamdrwlkadkmclanvvcmaslkd,dxamlcfknvcmlkemncavmkcax!"£$%$£"£$%$£"£$%^&*(*&*()(*&^%$£"£$%^&*&^%$£"£$%^&*()(*&^%$£"£$%^&*()_)(*&^%$£"£$%^&*(*&^%$£"£$%^&*&^%$£"£$%^&.
If you don't make any sense out of that how do you expect me to do it????? Haaaaa????? Tell me!!!!! Life is complicated. But mine is f*cked. Simple as that. Now what am I supposed to do? I guess am thinking to much. Aaaaaaaaaaaahh!.!.! What to do??? Well say something. Don't just sit there. Write something on the comments! I don't care what. Just put something for me to see. Am going crazy here! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Anyway, am out of here. Bye bye!!!
ps. don't let me think. It's Dangerous!!!